Surgery...Done

My surgery was yesterday morning and it went well.  I'm covered in bandages for a while and on pain meds and antibiotics.  I slept all the way to Pine Bluff after the surgery, and I get to recover at home with my entire family.  I'm a very happy person right now.  Hopefully, this will be the last of my cancer surgeries/treatments.  I feel like I'm about to close this chapter of my journey.  Hallelujah!!  I'm having surgery soreness and lots of throat pain, but I'm treating it as best I can.  I may not be able to eat much Thanksgiving dinner today, but maybe by the weekend my throat will allow it.  Pardon my ramblings, but pain meds can do that to me.  Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Another Surgery

Update:  Well, the abdominal pains are still there and still a mystery.  I've had a CT Scan and even went to a GI doc to explore possibilities.  They started a round of tests too.  I will probably call my oncologist again to have that MRI done since it's still here after 3+ weeks.

Surgery:  As far as I know, the outpatient surgery is still on for Wednesday.  My surgeon wants to see me tomorrow to discuss the abdominal pain I've had.  It's not in an incision spot, so I think we'll have this one as planned.  This procedure will start at 7:30 and will last about 3 hours.  I hope to be home by 3:00 or so and feeling pretty normal in 1 day or so.  Hopefully, I'll have an appetite for Thursday's dinner.  ;-)  On a side note, I find that I'm tired don't want to go to bed like I usually do around 9:00.  It may be some anxiety about the procedure. As usual, prayers are appreciated.  Thank you.

Abdominal Problems

Just when I thought I was on my way to a full recovery, I started having pain in the left side of my abdomen.  It's been two weeks and the pain is still very intense.  I called my doctor's office after a few days of the pain, and they brought me in for a CT scan.  I was told that it looked okay but to come back for an MRI if it continues for two weeks.  So, I wait. 

The pain is still there - especially during the evening hours and when I pull or bend.  I have made an appointment with a gastroenterologist for next Wednesday, and my plastic surgeon wants to see the CT scan report and film next week to determine if this will impact my upcoming surgery.

The pain started like a cramp in a distinct area in the left side of my abdomen.  I stretched to see if it would go away, but it didn't.  It worsened and seemed to go through to my back in the same area.  It interferes with my ability to get to sleep at night, but it responds to pain medicine and eases when I find a comfortable position and be still.  I know something's going on in there, but I'm not sure if it's muscular or digestive.  The scan showed that my kidneys looked fine.

So, here's another thing to add to your prayer list.  :-) 

Life as Usual

The 2011 Race for the Cure - Memphis went very well. It was only one-fourth the size of the race in Little Rock, but it was very nice.  I walked the entire 5K.  I haven't done that since before chemo.  Oh, and all three of my girls did it with me...yes, even Camille!! 

I've been pondering several things lately.  I still have a few loose ends to take care of, but I'm looking forward to getting involved in some very worthy causes.  I don't know how much of it I'm up to yet, but I know it's a passion, so I'm leaving it up to God.  Also, I really need to get moving physically.  I need to start an exercise program as soon as I can get rid of these pains.  I never expected the July surgery to affect me this long.  But, it is what it is.

I know I should take my time and get well, but to me, some things just need to be DONE.  There are so many needs out there and so few willing contributors.  As author Ron Hall said at last night's Heartlight, "What will happen to them if I DON'T stop and help?"

BC Fighters

As I sit here preparing my mind for Saturday's festivities, I will try to list all the breast cancer survivors that I know personally and will be walking in honor of this Saturday.  It's a long list,  but hey, isn't that wonderful???????

SV Church:
Tricia L.
LeAn R.
Bettye L.
Corrine G.
Liz C.
Charlotte B.
Denise H.
Kathy G.
Carol
Rhonda B.

Central Church:
Valerie P.
Laverne W.
Susan H.

Friends and Family:
Veronica S.
Denise W.
Regina B.
Janice B.
Patty R.

Thankfully, I don't know very many who have succumbed to this disease.  Here are the ladies in whose memory I'll be walking Saturday:
Carolyn T.
Dorothy H.
Andrea B.
Barbara J.
Glenda

Getting Itchy

Still waiting for the results from my blood work.  Still have the "rash".  Now, it's itchy at times.  I lost my paper prescription, so I'll call tomorrow to ask for it to be called in and to check on my blood work.

Outpatient surgery has been scheduled for Wednesday, November 23rd.  This is Thanksgiving Eve, so it looks like we won't be traveling for Thanksgiving after all.  Should be a quick recovery though - back to normal when the kids go back to school that next Monday!

Hair Regrowth

I can't believe how much my hair has grown.  It feels baby-soft too.  Here are some pictures of a style I experimented with tonight.  It was blow dried, flat ironed, and curled.

Still Updating...

I’m not sure how many still read this blog, which is a good thing.  That means not much is going on with regards to my cancer treatment.  J  In some ways, the time has flown by, but in others, it seems like this has been a very LONG year and a half.  Those of you who are still checking on my and praying for me, I thank you. 

Please don’t stop praying for cancer survivors because this is something we will have to live with our entire lives: oncology checkups, body scans, blood work, the emotional pain of learning of another cancer patient who has relapsed or passed away, and the fear that anything “unusual changes” should be checked out.  I was told at the start of my journey, “once a cancer patient, always a cancer patient”.  I now understand what that means.  So, keep us in your thoughts and your prayers.

At this point, my healing has greatly improved.   I no longer have to pack my abdominal wound.  YAY!!!  And the upper wound is getting noticeably shallower each week.  At this week’s follow-up appointment, my surgeon talked about scheduling the second phase of my reconstruction for middle October.  This phase will be outpatient surgery at Baptist East and should be a very quick recovery – 2-3 days since I work from home.  Thankfully, we have Fall break during the middle of October, so I hope it can be scheduled for that week.  Terry plans to be off that week too.  This procedure will be symmetric adjustments and other tweaks.  There are lots of little things to do, but nothing major.  The surgery should take about 3 hours, but with pre-surgery and recovery, I’ll be there most of the day.  I’m excited about the changes that will occur from this phase.

On a slightly irritable note, I am going to the oncologist office today at noon to have a sudden “rash” checked out.  It came on suddenly, in several parts of my body, and does not itch.  It has been there for 3 weeks and has not improved.  The doctor want to know about anything unusual that happens and does not go away in 2 weeks.  They may order blood work too.  We’ll see…

Rough Week - Prayers Please

It's been a difficult week for me, emotionally.  I'm dealing with many residual effects of the cancer (non-physical stuff).  I guess you can say, I'm feeling faith "growing pains".  Throughout this cancer journey, I've lost a lot of things, and with each loss, I've learned to trust in God all the more.  I know God is (and will be) glorified through all this.  I just need your prayers in the midst of it all.  Thank you.

Seeing Some Improvement

Since my last post, my wounds seem to have filled in a bit.  The pain has subsided a lot too.  I will visit with my surgeon again Tuesday to see how much I've progressed.  I hope he'll be able to give me an idea of how long this will last. At my last visit, I asked my surgeon why he won't just re-stitch me.  He explained the risk of infection if he did that.  For some reason, some special cases (like me) have wounds that re-open after the stitches are removed.

6 Weeks Post-Op

I had expected to be in "full steam ahead" mode by now, but it's not happening.  My surgical wounds are still far from healed.  In fact, I was in Dr. V's office yesterday almost certain I had an infection in the wound area.  Thankfully, nothing is infected.  The healing is very slow, but the tissue inside the wounds still looks healthy, according to the doctor.  To help speed it along, I need to increase my intake of protein and vitamin C.  And, it appears that I was packing my wounds too tight, which was contributing to the pain. 

I've researched this enough to know that a big part of the problem is my BMI.  Additional flab decreases the blood flow necessary to speed up healing.  Also, chemotherapy plays a part in the healing factor.  As Dr. V told me yesterday, "it will happen... it just will take some time". 

Iron Transfusion

Last week, at my doctor appointment, Dr. T. was once again concerned about my iron levels in my blood work.  My red blood count had already been low due to treatment, but surgery made it drop even more.  What I didn't realize is that he sent the blood off for further testing.  Apparently, the results were not good, because the clinic called me today to schedule a four-hour iron transfusion.  This explains the headaches, dizziness, and light-headedness I had last weekend.

I decided not to call Dr. T. Monday about the dizziness because I had already decided it was due to low red blood count (iron).  I have some iron supplements a doctor gave me 2 years ago, so I started taking them Monday morning.  It has helped.  I talked to the RN and I was still advised to have the transfusion because it works much faster and without the side effects of the pills.  I decided to follow their suggestion and will receive the transfusion Friday morning in the treatment room of The West Clinic...just when I thought I wouldn't ever go there again.

Hairdo by Sarah

Check out my hair growth:

Of course, I'd never wear this style outside my house.  :-)  Fully extended, my hair is about 3 inches long now.  I wear it pretty tightly curled (wet curly).

Recovery Woes

My problem areas are still not healing well.  This is according to me though, for I have not seen the doctor since Tuesday, and he's not concerned about it.  I'm changing bandages twice a day - using the wet/dry bandaging technique with saline solution. 

Also, I've been troubled with dizziness and lightheadedness for three days now.  I wasn't sure until last night why this was happening, but now I'm confident I'm dealing with anemia.  My red blood count has been low since chemo because the Herceptin can cause anemia too.  Then I had surgery, which has caused it to drop further.  I think my additional leakage from the problem area is causing it to drop even further.  Anyhow, I will probably be calling Dr. T. tomorrow about this.

In the meantime, I've been eating Cream of Wheat and other high-iron foods and increased my intake of orange juice (for absorption).  Also, I've started taking iron supplements that I've had since 2009 and chose not to take.  :-) 

6-month Testing

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." (Isaiah 43:2 NIV).

Today, I had my 6 month testing done.  My CT Scan and tumor markers were all normal!!  This means so much to me - especially now that I've had my reconstruction.  I am cautiously optimistic that this cancer ordeal may actually be behind me.


I don't feel any stronger or any wiser, but I do feel that my faith has grown.  In spite of my shortcomings, God has carried me through so much.  People say they "admire" me.  I really don't get that.  I am only being carried.  We should admire and give praise to the carrier, the Almighty God.


"Dear Lord, thank You that I never have to walk through the fiery trials of life alone. You promised that You will never leave me, and I cling to that truth today. Also, thank You for sending friends to walk through the flames with me! They are some of my most treasured gifts. In Jesus’ Name, Amen."

Lots of Healing to Do

Today's visit with the surgeon went well.  He removed all my sutures and my last drain tube today, so in a way, I'm FREE!!  :-)  I do have a problem healing area that will require some wet/dry dressings to speed up the healing.  The RN gave me a mirror to see how to dress the area, and it nearly made me nauseous.  The problem area is deep and has to be packed twice a day.  Eww!  Dr. V assures me that this is not uncommon and that it will heal.  I don't have to be back until 1 month.  :-)

Followup With Surgeon

I had my followup visit with the surgeon yesterday and his exact words were "perfect".  :-)  He actually seemed impressed with the way I'm healing and the success of the surgery...like it's not so typical.  I, also, have been surprised by the pain level.  It's been much better than I expected.  I know I should be in serious pain, but I'm already down to 3 pain pills a day when I'm "approved" for up to like 10!  Who would take that many pills in one day?  I mean, really?!  Oh, and to top it off, he removed 2 of the 3 remaining drain tubes!!  I feel almost free.  Bottom line: THE PRAYERS ARE WORKING!!!

Next Tuesday, I'll revisit the surgeon and probably have the last tube removed.  Yay!  Next Wednesday, I'll have my next CT scan at the West Clinic.  *sigh*  I will immediately see my oncologist, Dr. T., to discuss the results of my scan.  I'm not nervous about it.  Quite honestly, I know this goes with the territory, but I don't think I'll have a recurrence in my life.  I believe I'm cancer-free, not in remission.  I think I'll have scans every 6 months or so until I'm 5 years out; then it will be every year.

Well, I feel my night dose of pain meds kicking in, so I better get offline now and get to sleep. 

Surgery = DONE!

I'm home!  After a 4-day hospital stay, I was able to come home this morning - one day earlier than expected!  The surgery went very well on Monday.  Aside from some minor complications during recovery, the process was pretty uneventful.

The DIEP is great.  I have tenderness in the abdomen from the stitches, but the muscles are still there so rising, sitting, and lying down aren't at difficult as it could be.  The reconstruction site is also doing well.  There was constant blood flow so no problems there.  The only issues I had were on day one and two.  I has some elevated BP and temperature, then my blood absorption was a bit low a couple of time, requiring some oxygen.  Those factors cleared up quickly and were in perfect range the last two days of my hospital stay.

It's hard to believe this is the last phase of my breast cancer journey.  I thank and praise God for carrying me through this cancer experience.  I am a better person after it.  I hope to be used greatly for the Lord and bless the lives of many because of it.  I'm in a peaceful place right now.

One More Day

This time tomorrow, I'll be taking my last swig of water before midnight.  After that, it's to bed then to surgery Monday morning. 

I think I'm a little bit anxious.  I'm in a daze this weekend.  Nothing really on my mind... just dragging.  Tomorrow morning, when I go to church, it will be the last time I'll have to wear my prosthesis.  Wow!  I am excited about getting this reconstruction over with, but I'm not excited about the painful recovery it will require.  Feel free to keep me in your prayers.

Feeling "Blah"

I'm not sure why, but I feel so "blah" tonight.  Trying to think about all the things I won't be able to do over the next 5-6 weeks and trying to be proactive.  Feeling down and not sure why.  So tell me, what does "normal" feel like again?  I think I've forgotten.

Surgery Anxiety

Friday night was crazy!  I got in bed at 1:00ish and could not sleep.  I laid there for almost 2 hours and decided to get up and watch a movie until I got sleepy.  As it turned out, I watched the entire movie - a great tearjerker, I might add - but still was not sleepy after 4:30!  I found myself thinking about the surgery.  Little things like: what will I look like afterwards? What should I pack?  How will I tolerate visitors?  Will I be able to work at all that week?  I finally went to sleep at daybreak - 5:30 Saturday morning - and slept two hours before getting up to take Sarah to a hair appointment.  Not a good experience!

Two Great News Flashes!!

First of all, my friend who I told you about who had the recurrence scare got her biopsy and results this week.  It's BENIGN!!!  We are praising God whole-heartedly for this blessing.

Secondly, my cardiologist has cleared me for my surgery.  It looks like the pre-op EKG test had a glitch on Monday, but to be certain, he did another EKG today, and it looks great!  Yay God!!

So Long, Herceptin

I had my last Herceptin infusion today.  It didn't feel like my last though.  Maybe that's because I'm so used to having them every three weeks for the past year, or maybe it's because doubt is creeping in.  I hugged my RN goodbye today and promised to stop by to say hello when I'm there for my checkups. 

It's funny, everyone expects you to feel celebratory when you complete a milestone in cancer treatment.  But just like when I completed chemotherapy, I feel a little exposed and vulnerable.  I hope that will pass soon.

Pre-Op Tests and End of Treatments

Yesterday, I went to University Methodist Hospital for my pre-admission testing.  It went very quickly, so I was pleasantly surprised.  They check my temp, my BP, my weight, my blood for all sorts of things, my heart (EKG), and even my chest (x-ray).  I did paperwork and visited with the anesthesiology dept. 

I received a call today from my surgeon's office saying my tests showed an abnormality in my EKG, so I will need medical clearance from my cardiologist before I can have the surgery.  Also, since I'm not sure whether or not I'm a sickle cell carrier, that needs to be verified before the surgery as well.  *sigh*  So, now, I will be tested, and hopefully cleared, by my cardiologist Friday afternoon.  I think the heart issue is related to the Herceptin since that treatment carries with it heart side effects.  Hopefully, there is nothing wrong.

Speaking of Herceptin, I will have my last Herceptin treatment tomorrow morning.  Wow!  After 1 year and 1 month of the treatment room at The West Clinic, I will leave there tomorrow, possibly never to return.  I'll miss the RNs there, but I suppose I can always stop by and say hi when I'm there for my periodic checkups.  I feel like I'm about to close the Cancer chapter of my life...especially after this reconstruction is done. 

So, now here are my prayer requests:

• that my heart is healthy and can withstand a 6-8 hour surgery under general anesthesia
• that my cancer will not return after the Herceptin is stopped
• that my July 27th CT scan is clean
• that in everything I do and everything I go through, God will be glorified!

Thank you so very much.

Psalm 5:3-4

 “In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation” (Psalm 5:3-4 NIV)

This may become my latest favorite passage of scripture.  I prayed for God's guidance today before reading this scripture.  I know what He's telling me in this time of waiting on the Lord.  Thank you!


Life has been busy lately with one child preparing for college, another child preparing for high school, cancer treatments coming to an abrupt end, and reconstruction quickly approaching.  There has been a whirlwind of emotions inside of me, and I'm not sure how well I'm handling it all.  Sometimes, I feel like I'm sinking and other times like I'm soaring.  I have found that with a cancer diagnosis comes a very low toleration for negativity.  It irks me to the nth degree!!  It seems like there are times when I'm joyful all by myself.


My dear friend has been a cancer survivor for 12 years and has recently found a lump in her breast.  Yesterday's ultrasound looked scary, so she will have a biopsy in the next few days.  So much has happened in her life since her cancer bout.  I pray this isn't another one.  We survivors would like to think that after the magic 5 year mark, you're scott free.  Unfortunately, once a cancer patient, always a cancer patient.


My surgery will be in less than 3 weeks.  The pre-op visit is next Monday (6/27).  I'm looking forward to the outcome of the surgery, but I dread the recovery.  I know it will be most uncomfortable, but I know several people who have been through it and don't regret it.


Thank for continuing to read my blog.  I know it hasn't been very active lately.  I hope you continue to pray for me and my family.  It's comforting to know that others care so deeply.

Milestones

How do you know when you're returning to normal?  

1. When you can cut the front yard in 95 degree heat!!  (Yeah, and Terry was NOT happy about that when he found out!!!)
2. When you can do a  2 mile walk/power walk interval most days of the week.  Yippee!!

Yet Another Re-Scheduling

Well, my surgery is now scheduled for July 11th.  The surgeon had a very good reason for the change, but it sure does change a lot of my plans!  Oh well, like my mother says, "everything happens for a reason".  ;-)

I'm still doing well.  I have only two Herceptin treatments left, then it's "wait and see".  That makes me a bit nervous, but I know they'll be keeping a close eye on me.  My next scan is scheduled for July 27th, so feel free to start praying now.  :-)

I rented and watched a terrific movie from Netflix titled "Living Proof".  It has changed my perception of my type of cancer.  I'd love for all of you to watch it if at all possible.  It was a awakening  for me in many ways.  When you see it, you'll understand why.

Surgery Re-Scheduled

Yay!  My surgery date has been moved up to June 10th!  Now, I should be back on my feet by the end of July.

Rejoice!!!

"...Why do you seek the living One among the dead? He is not here, but He has risen." 

~ Luke 24:5-6 ~

Happy Easter!!

Surgery Finally Scheduled

I met with Dr. Ver Halen Tuesday afternoon to discuss my abdominal CT results and my upcoming DIEP flap surgery.  The scan was good.  He says I have a very good artery that he can use without any problem, and my skin looks good enough to have the surgery in early June.

The next day, the scheduler called to tell me my surgery is scheduled for July 15.  Wow!!!!  That late?  At first I wasn't pleased with such a late date.  She said Dr. V is very booked and that was the earliest available.  She marked my file to move the date up if someone cancels.

Now that I've thought about it, I see some positives about having a late surgery date.  The upside is that we may be able to take a vacation in early July - right before my surgery.  The girls would have to miss church camp though.  But at least my entire summer wouldn't be spent cooped up like last summer was.  The down side is I won't be in any shape to help Rachel move into the dorm in mid-August.

No matter when it takes place, I'm just thankful to have this option and to have health insurance that pays for it.  :-) 

Diagnosis - One Year Later

One year ago today, Monday, April 5, 2010, I answered the telephone around 8:30am.  The call was from Dr. Patterson.  I had awaited this call all weekend, for he was calling to give me my biopsy results – whether they were positive or negative.

I can almost remember the conversation verbatim.  He said he had “received the results from the lab, but it was not good news.”  He said the biopsy revealed cancer calls in my breast tumor.  He actually got the call on Saturday, but didn’t want to “spoil my Easter Sunday”.  I don’t recall what I said, but I think all I said was “Oh my goodness” or “Oh no”… or something like that. 

In a sense, it seems like that was a long time ago, but on the other hand, it seems like only yesterday.  The past year has been a roller coaster ride for me, but without the exuberance.  :-)  I’ve felt shocked, fearful, sad, stressed, confused, loved, lonely, and peaceful.  Physically, I’ve felt pain, fatigue, nausea, numbness, and tingling…and some days I’ve felt quite normal. By the way, I’ve come to appreciate those days very much.

All in all, it’s been a good year.  God has healed me and has carried me through the first year, A.C. (after cancer), and I know He’ll continue to walk with me beyond.  “Once a cancer patient, always a cancer patient”, I’ve been told.  I know my life will not be the “same”.  Every unusual pain I feel will lead to worry.  Every story of relapse will humble me greatly.  Every time I hear of someone dying from cancer, I will shudder.  But for now, I’m in remission and I feel good.  I’ll take it! And I’ll praise God for it!

Last Year This Time...

...was Easter weekend, and my last weekend B.C. (before cancer).  Who knew that my life would change so much after that?

On My Mind - Psalm 23

I've read this chapter multiple times and have even committed it to memory, but lately it has been on my mind.  Here are my thoughts this afternoon as I meditate on the 23rd Psalm:

Psalm 23

(with my own personal annotations)

¹ The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.

(Why should I ever complain?)

² He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

(Why should I ever stress?)

³ he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
   for his name’s sake.

(Why should I ever feel lost?)

⁴ Even though I walk
   through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
   for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
   they comfort me.

(Why should I ever be afraid?)

⁵ You prepare a table before me
   in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
   my cup overflows.

(Why should I ever lack confidence?)

⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
   all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
   forever.

(Why should I ever stop following You?)

Zyan M.

My cousin is pregnant with her first child and due April 15th.  We just learned that the unborn baby has the chromosomal disorder, Trisomy 18, also called "Edwards Syndrome".  The family is devastated.  Zyan is not expected to survive birth, but it has been decided to "let nature take its course".  Please pray for my cousin Cresha, the grandparents, and for baby Zyan - for peace for all and comfort for Zyan. 

42nd Birthday

Today is my 42nd birthday.  Birthdays hold a whole new meaning for me now.  When I consider that this time last year, I had NO idea that I was walking around with cancer and that my life would forever be changed, I realize how fragile and how precious life is.  On March 18, 2010, I noticed a lump.  A few days later, I decided to call my GYN.  The rest is history.  Had I not done that, I may not be here today.

That's so humbling!  God saw fit to keep me here a little while longer.  I'm honored that He has entrusted me with more time...with another birthday.

Still Here

I'm still "resting" and healing before the big surgery.  Well, I rest sometimes, but life is just so busy.  Emotionally, I've had a few difficult days lately, and when I'm feeling down, I don't like to blog.  I'm doing much better now, so please keep me in your prayers.

Reconstruction Update

I've decided on the DIEP flap procedure.  The surgeon wants to wait until June to do the surgery - six months after radiation.  Today, I had a cat scan of my abdomen done in preparation for the DIEP surgery.  I will meet with the surgeon again soon to discuss the scan results and schedule the surgery.  For now, I keep waiting...

Consultation With DIEP Doc

I met with the DIEP flap specialist this morning to discuss the procedure and my candidacy for it.  I liked him a lot.  My first impression was that he's very young.  He was knowledgeable, kind, and thorough.  I didn't like having to have photos taken, but I know that's standard procedure.  I prayed before the consultation - for clear direction as I choose between the TRAM and DIEP flaps.  I left with no reason not to choose the better, high-tech DIEP procedure.

The surgery would take place downtown at Methodist, which is about an hour from home.  It would take approximately 6 hours to complete.  I'd be in ICU for 2 days and in the hospital for 5 days - barring no complications.  The surgery is not very risky.  In fact, it has a 97% success rate.  Yeah, that's impressive.  This doctor does these procedures very often - in fact he's the only surgeon in TN and nearby states who does this procedure.  He says he's only had 1 case where the flap died (due to failed blood flow).  I asked him what happens in that case and he told me they'd have to do a latissimus dorsal flap in those rare cases.  I know that probably means NOTHING to most people, but I know exactly what that means.  It means they'd have to do another surgery, taking tissue and skin from the back.  I feel comfortable that I'll be among the 97% success stories though.  :-)

Bottom line, it feels like a no-brainer.  This is a better option.  I can keep my abdominal muscles intact.  I am healthy enough to be a candidate for the surgery.  Insurance coverage is not a problem.  I guess all systems are "go" after I pass a CT Scan of my abdomen to make sure I have no blood flow issues or hernias from previous surgeries.  That is scheduled for the 24th.  After that checks out okay, as he expects it will, I will schedule the surgery for late May or June.  He requires that I wait until 6 months post-radiation.

I can't say that I feel 100% sure that this is God's clear direction, but I don't feel that there's any reason not to have the procedure.  Regardless, I'll wait a few days before canceling my Monday appointment with the TRAM flap surgeons.  I think I'm just a bit overwhelmed about the ICU part.  Oh, and the symmetrical procedure on the other side would be done 3 months after the DIEP as an outpatient procedure.  With the TRAM, it would be done the same day.  I guess at this point, I'm 95% sure I'll be doing the DIEP around June.  Please keep me in your prayers.

Fatigue

Wow!  I'm not sure why, but I've been so very tired lately.  Thursday and Friday were so bad, I thought maybe something could be wrong with me, like maybe I was coming down with an illness or something.  I was fairly busy this week, but not nearly as hectic as some weeks I've had.  I've been told that it can take a year to recover from chemo, and I've heard three months to recover from radiation.  I guess maybe these are residual affects of them both.  Today's been good though.  :-)

Update and Nutrition

I've been doing okay.  I feel like I'm doing great, but then after a few hours of busyness, I get pretty tired.  Sometimes, I feel like I'm just plain ole lazy.  Other times I wonder if it has something to do with my increase in weight (which by the way is a mystery to me).  Donna (Dr. T's nurse) said the weight gain is probably due to the fluctuation in hormones - menopause on, then menopause off.  She said to do what I feel like doing, but to listen to my body.  Hmmm... many times, my body says "don't get out of the bed".  LOL... can't do that!

I've been juicing again.  I hope this will help with my energy levels.  I really like this juice recipe and use it often:

1 pear
1 green apple
2 carrots
broccoli or kale

I may switch up at times, but I think I'll stick with these ingredients as staples.  I juice in the morning most days.  My cousin told me about a powder that can be added to bottled water, shaken and drank when I cannot juice.  It's called "Go Greens".  I bought it, but don't like it much at all.  I'll use it on days when I need to juice but don't have the time.  I've decided to go back to drinking green tea and honey at night.  I read a very interesting article last night titled "The Anti-Cancer Diet".  It lists 10 foods believed to fight and prevent cancer.  Read the article here when you get a chance.  Here are the 10 foods/groups:

Garlic
Berries (blueberries, blackberries, strawberries, etc.)
Tomatoes
Cruciferous vegetables (cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower)
Green tea
Whole grains
Tumeric
Leafy greens (kale, collards, mustards)
Grapes (red)
Beans (pinto, red kidney, etc.)


I love this list.  I eat all of these, except for tumeric seasoning, so I plan to have at least 2-3 every day.  I'm a big believer in natural healing.  I believe the cure for cancer is in the foods God gives us.  Bon Appétit!

And the Praises Continue!!

God is so good...as if we didn't already know that.  :-)  It's just good to say it from time to time.

My friend, Tricia, received wonderful news yesterday that her PET/CT scan was clean!!  Tricia has been through breast cancer twice, and now pancreatic cancer too.  She is truly a vehicle of God's glory.  I was so happy when I got the news yesterday, I broke down in tears.  I didn't even react that strongly when I got my own "clean" report.  It's just that she's been through such a tough time, and I pray this will be her last bout with cancer.  What a testament to God's power and his love!

Instincts Kicking In

This time off has been good for me.  I'm healing nicely.  I'm listening to my instincts.  I'm slowly regaining my strength.  I usually feel good, but some days, I'm just plain ole tired!  This reminds me of all my body has been through lately.

I missed the consultation with the DIEP surgeon on January 4th because the PET scan tool longer than anticipated.  Funny thing is, I haven't had the desire to reschedule.  my gut keeps telling me to stick with Dr. Adams and the TRAM flap procedure.  While the new, cutting-edge, DIEP procedure sounds great, I'm not thrilled about the longer surgery time, the drive to downtown Memphis (UT hospital is the only one equipped for this surgery), and only know of one person who has used this surgeon... and she didn't exactly 'sing his praises'. 

On the other hand, I've visited with Dr. Adams a few times, I LOVE his nurse, Carolyn, and I know of at least 3 people who have been to Dr. Adams and highly recommend him.  Yes, I'd have to lose an abdominal muscle with the TRAM flap, but my cousin had this procedure several years ago, and she's doing great!  She had a double mastectomy, so she had to lose both abdominal muscles.  However, she says it hasn't disturbed her quality of life one bit.  I called Carolyn a week ago to ask her if it would be INSANE to consider asking Dr. Adams to remove both muscles for symmetrical reasons.  She said he highly discourages that.  So, I may never be able to sit up again without having to roll sidewards or roll forward using a bent let, but I think I can live with that.

"A Good Day"...

...says Dr. T in his office today after letting me know that my PET Scan was good.  The report says everything is normal and there is "no evidence of disease".  It was taken from the base of skull to mid-thighs.  I am very thankful.

So now, I will move forward with my reconstruction plans and continue having Herceptin treatments every three weeks.  I asked him why these are still necessary if the PET was clean.  He said while the PET is the best scan out there, it still cannot detect microscopic cancer particles.  Therefore, one year of Herceptin is necessary.  Then they'll continue to do scans periodically for 5 years.

Also today, I had my followup visit with my radiation oncologist.  He says I'm healing very well, and there is no need to return to him.  This has been a day of good news.  Thank you so much for your prayers!

"The LORD is my strength and my shield; My heart trusts in Him, and I am helped; Therefore my heart exults, And with my song I shall thank Him." -- Psalm 28:7

Big Day Tomorrow - PET Scan

Tomorrow morning, I will have my first PET/CT scan.  This scan should identify any cancer areas in the entire body.  Now that all treatment is over, this test will reveal much. I'm a little nervous because it's been almost 4 months since my last chemo.  If there were any cells remaining after chemo, they have had lots of travel time.  Since my cancer was so very aggressive, this test really needs to be done.

I cannot eat anything after midnight tonight.  I can only drink water before the scan.  They will inject me with glucose then wait about an hour before doing the scan.  Cancer cells consume more glucose than normal cells, so the scan will reveal any "hot spots" in my body.  "Hot spots" are indicative of cancer.  For some reason, I must have someone drive me there and back.  I will go back Wednesday morning for a visit with Dr. T and my PET scan results.

Please pray that the scan will be accurate and conclusive.  Also, please pray for good results and acceptance on my part.  Thank you and goodnight.

New Awareness

Happy New Year!!!  I've heard this many times this week.  I thought I’d look forward to 2011.  I was planning to bid 2010 farewell and look forward to the new cancer-free me in 2011.  As it turned out, New Years Eve was scary for me.  I’ve become more aware of the fact that next year, next month, even next week, is not guaranteed.   

I’m humbled by this new awareness.  It’s scary, but life never has been within my control.  I guess I never realized the false sense of security I had until now.  The only goal I can truly set is 'God’s Will'.  So, I am resolved to thank God for each day and strive to do His will.