Diagnosis - One Year Later

One year ago today, Monday, April 5, 2010, I answered the telephone around 8:30am.  The call was from Dr. Patterson.  I had awaited this call all weekend, for he was calling to give me my biopsy results – whether they were positive or negative.

I can almost remember the conversation verbatim.  He said he had “received the results from the lab, but it was not good news.”  He said the biopsy revealed cancer calls in my breast tumor.  He actually got the call on Saturday, but didn’t want to “spoil my Easter Sunday”.  I don’t recall what I said, but I think all I said was “Oh my goodness” or “Oh no”… or something like that. 

In a sense, it seems like that was a long time ago, but on the other hand, it seems like only yesterday.  The past year has been a roller coaster ride for me, but without the exuberance.  :-)  I’ve felt shocked, fearful, sad, stressed, confused, loved, lonely, and peaceful.  Physically, I’ve felt pain, fatigue, nausea, numbness, and tingling…and some days I’ve felt quite normal. By the way, I’ve come to appreciate those days very much.

All in all, it’s been a good year.  God has healed me and has carried me through the first year, A.C. (after cancer), and I know He’ll continue to walk with me beyond.  “Once a cancer patient, always a cancer patient”, I’ve been told.  I know my life will not be the “same”.  Every unusual pain I feel will lead to worry.  Every story of relapse will humble me greatly.  Every time I hear of someone dying from cancer, I will shudder.  But for now, I’m in remission and I feel good.  I’ll take it! And I’ll praise God for it!