This Is No Joke

This pain is intense!  It's non-stop, and sometimes, it's piercing.  I've got a prescription ointment to use, but it doesn't seem to be helping yet.  Hopefully, after my last treatment on Thursday, I'll be able to treat it more aggressively. 

On a higher note, Thanksgiving was very nice.  My parents, my older brother, and his fiancee came here.  My mother is here for a week.  Thank God!

Ouch!

Well, I did so well for so long, but here comes the pain!!  It kicked in Sunday night, and it hasn't let up.  My skin is very dark, tender, and even feels "leathery" in some spots.  The good news is, tomorrow will be my last day to receive radiotherapy in the sore areas.  Wednesday and thereafter, I'll only receive radiation at the scar.  The doctor gave me a prescription today to begin healing the sore areas.  The end is in sight...only 6 more to go! 

I found this wonderful book at the library titled Living Well Beyond Breast Cancer.  It addresses the holistic approach to healing after all treatment is complete.  I don't plan to read the entire book right now.  I just wanted to browse it before buying it.  If you're fighting breast cancer, I highly recommend it for you as well.

24 Down, 9 To Go

I'm starting to feel the fatigue that builds over time with radiation.  Monday and Tuesday of this week, I was exhausted, even with a nap!  Today, however, I feel pretty good.  My site area is pretty sore and is darkening - as expected.  I will make some adjustments there, but I'm extremely blessed!  I've had no burning or blistering - even at the high dose of radiation.  Oftentimes, the dosage has to be adjusted because the skin cannot handle it.  I am thankful to be so far "above the curve" as my doctor put it a couple of weeks ago.  As always, God is good.

My emotions are so weird.  Since the beginning, I've felt like someone on the outside, watching from afar.  I haven't felt anger or despair, the "why me's" or the devastation; but it seems like I should.  Other cancer patients feel this, but so far I still haven't.  I'm bothered by this "distant" feeling I'm experiencing.  It's like the shock has never worn off.  Sometimes, I feel down, but don't know why.  It's like an overall gray feeling, nothing in particular, but it passes.

I mentioned my hair growth in an earlier post.  Well, I've taken some pictures of my new hair.  It is very straight, so I look balder than I really am.  *LOL*  It's interesting to say the least.

“Fear can keep us up all night long, but faith makes one fine pillow.” - Author Unknown

See all those gray hairs?

Oncologist Visit

Yesterday, I visited with my oncologist - well, actually his nurse practitioner - before I had my treatment.  My white blood count is good.  Thank God, since the kiddos keep getting sick around here.  My iron is very low though.  He talked about putting me on iron supplements soon.  All in all though, I'm doing well. 

My "tell-all" PET/CT scan has been scheduled for December 21st.  This test will be very important as it should be able to detect any cancer spots in my body.  We had to wait until three weeks after all treatment is done to do this test, then I'll meet with Dr. T (oncologist) the day after to discuss the results.  The test is more complicated than I expected.  I can't eat after midnight the night before.  I'll be injected with glucose.  I must have someone to drive me home afterward.  I can't be around people for 1-2 hours afterward, so they will send me out a back door.  I don't quite understand that, but this is the case.  Anyway, I'm looking forward to Dec 22nd when he will tell me that I'm cancer-free - just in time for Christmas!!!  :-)

"Above the Curve"

Well, I'm halfway through radiation treatments, and in the words of my doctor yesterday, I'm doing very well with regard to skin damage.  Yay!!  I asked him is this meant I'd probably not have burning and/or blistering, and he said it's still a little too early to say that for sure, but that I was definitely "above the curve".  He thinks I'm in good shape to have reconstruction in mid-January - if the plastic surgeon says the same and if I choose to.  I felt great all day yesterday, but today was a different story.  I was tired from the time I left radiation and slept a couple of hours today.  Tomorrow, I see my oncologist and have Herceptin after my radiation treatment.  There's a real good chance I won't feel too energetic tomorrow afternoon.  :-)

One-Third Down, Two-Thirds to Go

I've completed 1/3 of my radiation treatments!!  I'm very thankful for not having any skin problems so far.  I've darkened a bit, and my skin/muscles are a little tight under my arm, but no burning.  This morning, I saw the doctor, and he says everything looks good.  I'm losing a little weight, which is very surprising to me considering my increased appetite.  This isn't something they want, but aren't too concerned about it right now.

Friday afternoon, I burned my left hand pretty badly.  I was placing a casserole in the oven and my left hand touched the top heating unit of the over.  Yes...the red coil itself!  It sizzled and I even smelled some burned flesh.  The wound was painful and is still white.  It burned at least two layers of skin and bubbled at first.  I've treated it with peroxide and Neosporin all weekend and kept it loosely covered to prevent infection.  The doctor looked at it this morning and said it looks very good.  It doesn't appear to have any infection, so I should keep doing what I'm doing.  What a relief!  I'm not sure what my white blood count looks like, so I do not welcome infection at all.  Also, I'm so very blessed and relieved that it was not the right hand.  With my lymphadema risk, I shouldn't have any trauma to the right hand or arm - not even a prick or a squeeze.

So, all in all, I'm doing well.  I get very sleepy after each radiation treatment and sometimes throughout the day, but I bounce back pretty quickly.  It's November.  This should mark the last month of  my cancer treatments - prayerfully, forever!  After this month, I rest.  I will start my new "normal", post-cancer life, and live cancer-free forever more...Lord willing.