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Wednesday, November 17, 2010

24 Down, 9 To Go

I'm starting to feel the fatigue that builds over time with radiation.  Monday and Tuesday of this week, I was exhausted, even with a nap!  Today, however, I feel pretty good.  My site area is pretty sore and is darkening - as expected.  I will make some adjustments there, but I'm extremely blessed!  I've had no burning or blistering - even at the high dose of radiation.  Oftentimes, the dosage has to be adjusted because the skin cannot handle it.  I am thankful to be so far "above the curve" as my doctor put it a couple of weeks ago.  As always, God is good.

My emotions are so weird.  Since the beginning, I've felt like someone on the outside, watching from afar.  I haven't felt anger or despair, the "why me's" or the devastation; but it seems like I should.  Other cancer patients feel this, but so far I still haven't.  I'm bothered by this "distant" feeling I'm experiencing.  It's like the shock has never worn off.  Sometimes, I feel down, but don't know why.  It's like an overall gray feeling, nothing in particular, but it passes.

I mentioned my hair growth in an earlier post.  Well, I've taken some pictures of my new hair.  It is very straight, so I look balder than I really am.  *LOL*  It's interesting to say the least.

“Fear can keep us up all night long, but faith makes one fine pillow.” - Author Unknown


See all those gray hairs?


1 comments:

Kidcraze said...

You have a beautiful head!
I'm not seeing much gray there, but I think we all see more of our own gray than others do ;)

Don't worry about what you "should" be feeling. You are unique and walk through this in your own way...there is nothing wrong with that. I think it enables you to be the fighter that you are.